Half-Caf Half Hallucination
Posted by Eric Wright | Labels: humor | Posted On January 14, 2009
I love coffee. I love coffee houses. I drink coffee almost every day...sometimes more! I belong to a church that stakes it's claim well within the boundaries of Coffeeland.Now a new study indicates that people who drink three cups of coffee a day (or seven cups of instant coffee; whoever they are!) are more prone to hallucinations and hearing voices than normal. Some coffee drinkers were even likely to see and speak with dead people.
And here I just thought I was crazy!
The article also states that caffeine may increase the effects of stress by allowing more cortisol into the blood stream. Which means that my relaxing cup of coffee isn't so relaxing after all.
The article waits till the very last paragraph, however, to state that maybe the people are just psychotic to begin with, and just happen to enjoy a good cup of coffee as well. Either way...this may explain a whole lot of things.
How many cups of coffee a day do you drink? (We will use this information to gauge the level of your psychosis.)
Usually on a non-meeting day... Two early in the morning, then I'm on vita water and diet dew or diet coke.
On a meeting day... depends on how many meetings. LOL. I've had up to 3 americanos in one day (but I paid for it later...).
On a work day, first cup is an 8oz, and the 2nd cup is a 6oz. (We have the ability with our coffee machine at work to choose how many.)
On the weekend, 12-16 oz depending on my mood.
After this it's all decaf.
I haven't had any coffee in the past few days, and already the voices have stopped... Wow!